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Tuesday 12-2-2003
I woke up this morning,
went to the bathroom and had a bloody show. Things
could be happening! I check online and it says that
means things are progressing...but that it could mean
hours or weeks until active labor starts! Hmmm...just
in case it’s today (& last night’s “labor-inducing
eggplant parmesan” recipe is working) I decide to take
a bath and shave my legs.
When I get out of the tub
I dry off and bend over the sink to brush my teeth.
Out comes a gush of warm clear fluid, probably about a
quarter cup. Oh my gosh I don’t think I just wet
myself! I smell the fluid it is definitely not
urine. It’s about 10:00 a.m. I get excited and call
the doctor’s office to see what happens next.
The receptionist answers
and I say “Hi, this is Laura K. I think my water just
broke.” She squeals and excitedly says this is the
first time she got one of these calls. She transfers
me to Leann (the best OB nurse in the world) who told
me to get myself and Curt over to the office – and
just in case, put my bag in the car!
I call Curt at work and he
says he’s on his way right away. I finish getting
ready, eat some raisin bran, decide to put a few
things away around the house and do the dishes that
are in the sink. Curt comes home and I can tell he’s
in “travel mode”, which is how he is right before we
leave for trips – checking everything and wanting to
hustle me out the door efficiently. And, here I am,
not having any regular or intense contractions (just
some Braxton-Hicks tightening which I had before),
seemingly lollygagging around the house. I was
starting to get excited but not too motivated to rush
yet. Finally, I get the last-minute stuff in my
hospital bag and we get out the door. I decide to let
him drive me even though I had talked about walking
the 7.5 blocks to the hospital – it was a little
chilly and my hubby was anxious.
10:45 a.m.
The doctor checks me and
confirms that my membranes have ruptured. Also, my
cervix is dilated to 4cm and is 100% thinned out. The
baby needs to arrive within 24 hours of the water
breaking to avoid risk of infection – so – it’s off to
the Birth Center!
11:00 a.m.
Curt & I arrive at the
Birth Center. Nurse Virginia introduces me to the
“Hotel” (it is very nice and homey there, you labor,
deliver, and stay in the same room) and shows me to my
room. I like it, it’s at the quiet end of the hallway
and is one of the newer rooms with a Jacuzzi tub.
YES! We fill out some paperwork as Curt gets the bags
out of the car. I am served and eat a “surgical
light” lunch (chicken noodle soup, pudding, milk,
juice) and meet my afternoon nurse Laura. I’m hooked
up to the contraction/fetal heartbeat monitor. To
help get active labor going she suggests walking and
natural nipple stimulation.
Tuesday Afternoon
Curt & I walk the halls of
the Birth Center. We do our “airport walking”
(continuing on the “travel mode” theme) and race each
other from one end of the hallway to the other. Curt
lets me win sometimes. Curt helps me with the natural
nipple stim as the nurse watches my contractions and
the baby’s heartbeat on the monitors. Curt pushes a
button when he starts the stim, then does it for one
minute, then takes 5 minutes off. Contractions start
happening because of it! But still, they are still
nothing to remark at – somewhat tighter feeling but
not regular on their own. I get frustrated with my
body and decide to rest. I end up having a good cry
instead. I write:
“Here I am in the birth
center, supposed to be napping and I can’t. Why?
This wasn’t supposed to happen – first regular
contractions & THEN the water is supposed to break.
Why am I in the 10% of women for which it is the
opposite? I didn’t envision it this way. The birth
of a baby is possible through contraction – I’ve
trained myself for it and it hasn’t happened yet.
It’s 3:45 p.m. – my water broke 6 hrs ago. Please
God, help this baby to come. I am scared of pitocin &
would rather keep this as natural as possible. But I
also need to try to enjoy the process, too. I must
let go of this anxiety and let things happen! God
please take away my fears about pitocin – I might not
even need it -- and let me accept things as they
happen. This is very important. I want a healthy
baby and I need your help. Amen. Baby, I love you &
can’t wait to meet you. I hope you arrive healthy and
soon! Let me know how I can help you out. I can’t
wait to be your mommy.”
I’m glad I wrote that
down, it helped to release the anxiety I was having
and helped me focus on what was ahead.
Tuesday Evening
Another doctor (who I have
met and is very nice) is on call tonight. He comes in
and checks me – I’m still at 4cm. He has read over my
birth preferences and understands that I want to avoid
picotin to intensify labor. He says that his general
rule is that, if labor hasn’t started within 12 hrs of
the water breaking that he will start pitocin – and if
that has to happen I probably wouldn’t need a high
dose since I had already progressed so far. I tell
him that I’m really wanting to avoid pitocin (I’ve
heard it can make contractions more painful than
normal and I wasn’t sure how that would work with my
self-hypnosis training) if possible and what else can
we do? He suggests walking and using the breast pump
for nipple stim. Also he says he can “strip my
membranes” now – I say yes, anything to encourage my
baby to come out on his own. It feels funny when he
does it, not pleasurable or uncomfortable, just like
he’s rimming the inside of a glass (my cervix) very
vigorously! It makes the baby move around, and makes
my legs very relaxed.
Curt & I walk around for
a while and come back to meet our night nurse,
Jennifer. [I admit, Jennifer is one of those nurses
who seems perky all the time. I was still a bit
discouraged that things weren’t working, she kind of
rubbed me the wrong way at first. I was so thankful
for her positive energy as the night went on,
though!] She started me on the breast pump and I saw
colostrum come out! Some contractions happened as
well but they weren’t picking up on their own. I was
tired of this routine and I just felt like I needed to
let my body rest for a few hours – I asked if the
doctor would hold off on the pitocin? Jennifer talked
with him and he said yes, he would wait until 2am –
and I could have an Ambien (sleeping pill) if I want.
I opt for half an Ambien to help me rest without being
too groggy.
12-3-2003 - Jerome’s
birthday
I woke up at 6:30 a.m.
this morning feeling refreshed and asked Jennifer “was
that a dream? Did that really happen last night?”
She said yes, it was a dream delivery – that she’d
never seen one quite like it and everyone was talking
about it.
I can’t believe my body
made a 9 lb 12 oz baby! AND, pushed him out so well.
When it came to pushing there was no stopping me – it
was time.
So what got this active
labor going? The breast pump? At 10:00 p.m. I had
one-half an Ambien to try and sleep for 4 hrs. Well,
that’s when my body started working on its own!
Regular contractions – first just tightening across my
lower abdomen (like hard menstrual cramps) then around
midnight it was getting more intense – at that point I
got in the Jacuzzi tub and that warm water was
relaxing.
By that time I was zoning
in my own world (Curt was very encouraging throughout,
he was a great DJ and kept the Theta wave CD going).
After a while I got out of the tub, wrapped a blanket
around me like a cape and curled up on my side in
bed. I had no inhibitions at all. There was more and
more tightening. One contraction was very long and
intense – I admit at this point I thought “a few more
like these...” but then I realized I was probably
almost there – I continued relaxing between
contractions and relaxing through them as best I
could, knowing he was coming soon and envisioning my
cervix opening and my uterus pushing him through like
a turtleneck over his little head. At this point Curt
had the “Transitions” CD playing...and when the music
ended I came-to right away and told him to start it
again! Amazing how self-hypnosis puts one in such a
focused state!
At about 1:45 a.m. I felt
Jerome moving down through my pelvis, it was amazing.
I muttered “he’s moving down” – Curt reached over and
called the nurse, she came right away and checked me
and I was complete and his head was a couple cm away
from crowning. She said he had hair, dark hair, and
told me to feel it!!! I did and it was so neat, the
top of his head was soft and squishy like a water
balloon. She called the doctor and, just in case he
didn’t make it in time, brought in the reinforcements
(2 nurses). I heard Jennifer say “she’s pushing
involuntarily” – I couldn’t resist doing little pushes
and then, as I saw his crown in my perineum in the
mirror I did several longer pushes with each
contraction. The doctor arrived within 13 minutes of
being called and was doing perineal massage – it felt
really good at times and the hot compresses felt
great! [Note: things were being set up and prepared
all around me but I was too focused on the task at
hand to really care. This is hypnosis at its best!]
I was pushing as I felt
the urge, and with their encouragement, too. They
were good and kept to my birth preferences – I didn’t
want to be coached to push by holding my breath for 10
seconds at a time. During pushing I remember saying
things like “come on baby, move down, keep moving
down.” My legs felt too long – up on the pedals they
were folded and tightening a little as I pushed. I
tried to relax them, it helped to let Curt and the
nurse hold them.
I kept up my style of
pushing. I heard the doctor say “push through the
burning sensation” – I vaguely felt some burning after
he said that, although if he hadn’t said that I don’t
think I would have noticed any burning. After
Jerome’s head came out it was the funniest feeling –
like his thick little neck was stretched out inside
me. I pushed out the rest of him (despite the
doctor/nurses crew saying “don’t push for a minute”)
and felt him slide out all wiggly and slippery-like!
I didn’t see him come out, I was too focused. I did
hear the doctor say “what do you think he weighs?” –
and a nurse said 10 lbs 2 oz – and I thought “HUH?”
They brought Jerome up to me right away – he was using
his lungs so much he was snorting his in-breaths! He
was rooting and sucking his hand, and the nurse helped
him latch on and nurse. The doctor was working down
there (sewing up a short 2nd degree tear) and I didn’t
pay attention except when they rubbed my tummy and the
warm placenta slid out. I looked at it later and it
was neat.
Today I’m a mommy. Curt
is a great, attentive daddy. He even changed a #1
diaper, cleaned the umbilical cord, picked him up and
talked with him, notified our families – and of course
helped and encouraged me throughout.
Happy Birthday Jerome.
You are beautiful, with brown hair and blond
highlights, dark blue eyes, long fingers and toes, and
big feet! Born at 2:14 a.m. on Wednesday, December
3rd, 2003. 9 lbs 12 oz, 20.5” long. Head
circumference 14
A day later:
Here's an interesting
FYI: my nurse Jennifer tested Jerome's bilirubin
levels early morning on Thursday -- and she said they
were the lowest she's ever seen them! She thought it
was unusual, especially considering that Caucasian
boys tend to have above average levels. I read
somewhere that a stressful delivery is one of the
factors contributing to high bilirubin/jaundice -- is
that true? If so, it would be pretty interesting.
The doctor said I did a
wonderful job, and acted much like someone who had an
epidural (???) I'm not sure what that means, but I'm
pretty sure it's a compliment!
Curt
was wonderful in creating and protecting my birthing
space. And, today I got breakfast and lunch in bed --
how nice is that???
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